We all know how it feels to be stuck in the office. Sometimes, we might even want to extract revenge on our bosses for keeping us tethered to the desk with a bungee cord that almost lets us get away.
And if we were a bunch on Chinese workers employed by the 100% legitimately named “Specialty Medical Supplies” corporation, we would take matters into our own hands.
Which, in the case of the Chinese workers, means holding their boss captive in his office for 5 days and counting. Take that, bossman. They won’t let him go until they get their severance package - however, according to their boss, they aren’t actually getting fired. If they work in a Chinese medical device factory though, their interpretation of a “severance package” is probably along the lines of “please pay me 3 yuan for the fact that that giant machine in the corner severed my hamstring leaving me paralyzed.” Bossman says, “But are you really?”
Chip Starnes, the owner, is trapped in a room by 110 employees, who, when they aren’t being the best babysitters the world has ever seen, are usually busy making diabetes testing equipment and alcohol pads, because…why not?
Starnes is an optimist though, telling reporters (who are allowed to freely chat him up) “If I can just make it over that fence and past the people guarding it, then I’ll be free.” True. Sort of like how if I could just run really fast and were 6 inches taller, I would be an Olympic hurdler. The captive also is “hoping to find someone who can get him a ladder and open the window so he can jump out.”
The power of positive thinking…let’s see how this goes.