Asked the 94 hamsters living in the home of a Massachusetts man. “Yes! You can!” he said. You can have all my welfare gruel. I will starve myself in order to feed you. This actually happened. Until he decided he needed his Tupperware back, and called the MSPCA to get them to take the little fluffballs off his hands.
It all started so innocently. All the guy did was buy two hamsters. Little did he know that these things are the poor man’s version of rabbits. They multiply. They just don’t get their own religious holiday. Yet. In a year and a half…94 hamsters. This posed…an issue, since 1) 94 fucking hamsters 2) the man is on welfare 3) he couldn’t use his buckets for carrying things like water or Gak, as they were housing all of his rodents.
Luckily, an animal shelter in Metheun, MA was willing to take the hamsters, so now the dude is just chilling on his own, eating his own welfare food and finally getting to use all those fishbowls he bought for normal purposes. Like drinking alcohol out of them.
